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Acharya Chanakya has said very deep and practical things in his policies to make every aspect of human life better and balanced. Their policies not only guide us in social and political life, but also play the most important role in keeping family relationships strong and unbreakable. One of the most sacred and sensitive relationships in the family is the relationship between father and daughter. The dignity and responsibilities of this special relationship have been explained in detail in Chanakya Niti. Acharya Chanakya believes that some wrong decisions or behavior of a father can not only darken his daughter’s bright future but can also harm the reputation of the entire family. Let us know about those 5 big mistakes mentioned in Chanakya Niti, which any father should always avoid doing with his daughter.
Never disrespect your daughter’s dreams and wishes.
According to Acharya Chanakya, the first and foremost duty of a father is to deeply understand his daughter’s feelings, her dreams and her ambitions. Many times it happens that due to his own thinking, the father is not able to completely agree with every wish of his daughter, but even in such a situation, he should not openly disrespect or insult his daughter’s wishes. Be it the daughter’s higher education, her career choice or the biggest decisions of her life like her marriage – it is very important to know her opinion and likes and dislikes at every turn. If a father ignores his daughter’s decisions without thinking, it completely breaks the daughter’s self-confidence and creates a deep distance forever in the sacred father-daughter relationship.
Do not impose unnecessary restrictions in the name of security
It is clearly stated in Chanakya Niti – ‘Natisandati Kanya Pita Yah Swachchhaya Charet’. This simply means that a father should not impose excessive control or restrictions on his daughter. In today’s modern era, it is very important to make the daughter mentally strong, self-reliant and independent. Doubting or restricting his every small and big activity, like meeting his friends, his studies or his career choice, suppresses his entire personality. Acharya Chanakya believes that imposing excessive restrictions stops the mental and intellectual development of the daughter. The job of a wise father is not to become a detective, but to give him a balanced guidance so that he can identify right from wrong on his own.
The way the father behaves, the daughter will become like that.
A father is the first hero of his daughter’s life and her biggest role model. Underlining this, Chanakya Niti says – ‘Father Dharma: Swayam Rakshet Kanya Drishti Prabhavati’. That is, a father should always keep his conduct, behavior and character absolutely clean and correct, because the daughter watches her father’s habits from moment to moment and unconsciously starts following the same. If a father lies in front of his daughter, misbehaves with others or indulges in any kind of inappropriate activities, it has a very bad and deep impact on the tender mind of the daughter. This not only ruins the family’s reputation in the society, but also makes the daughter lose trust in her father forever, which only leads to embarrassment and regret later on.
Haste or carelessness in the decision of daughter’s marriage is a big sin.
In Indian society, there is often a social pressure on parents regarding the marriage of their daughter. In this context, Chanakya Niti cautions and says – ‘Kanya danam vicharyaam syat na tvaya na chalsye’. This means that the decision of your daughter’s marriage should always be taken very thoughtfully, with a cool mind and only after thorough investigation. Neither any kind of haste nor any carelessness should be shown in this very sensitive decision. A father should always choose a life partner for his daughter who is compatible with her education, her values and her ideas. Due to social shame or any kind of pressure, hastily deciding the daughter’s relationship with the wrong person is like making her entire life hell, and this can be the most unforgivable mistake in any father’s life.
Compromising security is plain wrong.
Acharya Chanakya has considered the protection of the daughter as the biggest and first duty of a father. Niti Shastra says – ‘Kanya Raksha Pita Dharmah, Yatra Na Syat Tatra Doshah’. That is, it is the ultimate duty of every father to protect his daughter and any slight carelessness or negligence in this is directly a great sin. Here safety does not just mean physical safety, but a father should also take full care of his daughter’s mental, social and emotional safety. Whether the daughter is going to school-college, working or at home, what is the environment around her, whether anyone is troubling her mentally, the father should always be alert and aware about all these things. Even a small negligence on the security front can jeopardize the daughter’s entire future forever.